Did you see the “let’s have a 90’s summer” trend on social media? It seems like everyone is yearning for a time before smartphones when kids played outside until dark riding their bikes and just being kids.
Honestly, being a 90’s mom even sounds dreamy!
There are even a ton of style blogs on how to dress like a 1992 J Crew catalog - yes, please!
While this idea was trending, Jonathan Haidt’s The Anxious Generation was released. With robust supporting research, he thoroughly shared that our departure from a play-based childhood to a phone-based childhood is causing an epidemic of mental illness for our youth.
Haidt’s work has only validated how most of us were already feeling.
It all makes sense, our longing for a nostalgic time when things felt more simple.
How did we get here and can we ever go back?
Our phone-based living is greatly affecting well-being, and not just for kids, for all of us.
It’s not just that we are addicted to our phones and social media, it’s holding our precious time hostage, it’s disrupting relationships, it’s providing escapism, it’s stealing our ability to focus on anything and drastically shortening our attention span.
As Haidt says “A phone-based life generally pulls people downward. It changes the way we think, feel, judge, and relate to others…Many people feel a yearning for meaning, connection, and spiritual elevation. A phone-based life often fills that hole with trivial and degrading content.”
This is an urgent and critical time to consider a different way, even if it feels overwhelming and as if the train has already left the station.
But it’s not too late, and creating a better relationship with technology can be done one baby step at a time.
It just has to start with turning a nurturing and honest lens at your current tech relationship and what makes you feel tethered to your phones and devices.
With better self-awareness, you can start to make appropriate changes and shift habits.
Try these mindful steps* to gain more clarity around the impact your phone has on you:
Take out your phone and hold it in your hand without turning on the screen. Notice if there are any particular thoughts or feelings. Is there anything specific, or an impulse you want to do immediately?
Now, turn the phone on and unlock. What do you see? Again, pause here and notice how you feel now. Is there a draw to something in particular? What does that feel like in the body? What does it feel like to wait?
Proceed to the social media or email app of your choosing. Open it up and see how the mind and body respond to the content.
Set a timer to check in five minutes. When the timer goes off, again notice the thoughts and sensations in the body.
Seems simple enough, but it’s not all that easy. Most of us have become so robotic and habitual with our devices that even just slowing down in this way might feel silly and awkward. Just try.
This practice can offer you so much information. You can actually have fun getting curious noticing more and more of your thoughts, feelings and bodily sensations around using your tech. You might be surprised!
The key is to be gentle and kind with yourself and not judge your own thoughts, feelings and actions (our mind loves to do this) - - just notice and take note.
Perhaps after a week of this personal field research, you might have noticed enough patterns and habits that you feel ready to make a change.
Our devices have so many built-in tools to help us modify and monitor our usage patterns more mindfully.
Maybe you notice that you pick up your phone a lot just to check the time and decide to start wearing a watch! I did this. As a matter of fact, I broke out my old Nikon SLR so that I could take more photos with a camera and not with my phone. I’m loving these changes and already noticing the emotional benefits and freedom I am gaining not relying on my phone for these features.
You might also choose to join this “Phone Free Friday Summer Challenge”!

How and if you choose to calibrate your device use is really up to you, but gaining better mindful awareness is the most impactful way to choose wisely.
* Adapted from Mindful Schools and David Levy’s Mindful Tech
Also, here are some things that are making me smile:
This beautiful post on A Cup Of Jo encapsulates this 90’s summer nostalgia.
Be sure to read the comments, they are so rich and relatable!
My family is going to try this new campfire snack. Move over s'mores!
My sis and I just rewatched What About Bob? “I’m sailing! I sail!” We also watched
Point Break which is on this list of 10 Nearly Perfect 90’s Summer Movies
Now and then is one of my favorites!! I have a watch too and it's so helpful to have that instead of having to check my phone which leads to getting lost and distracted. Bring back the days of riding your bike everywhere and going home with dirty feet!